May 2012
3 posts
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1991 Felix Gonzalez-Torres Untitled (Perfect...
Wall clocks, slowly fall out of sync.
Nothing lasts longer than the lithium ones he said.
Do you know. I see you entered into a new space, such a cool room. The thermostat at constant with that quality of light on the wall. It is one warmly lit and we sit, at a table on a couch on a floor. Position depends on mood. Darling occasionally I am leaning on elbows across a counter my mind leaning...
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Celebrate!
So many reasons to celebrate with a party tonight…
1. After long nights, awl stab wounds, and fights with a sewing machine, our zines are printed, stitched, and finally up for sale at tonight’s party at Cheer Up Charlie’s! Thank you so much to all of you who contributed to our Kickstarter. You helped us surpass our goal and we want to high-five the lot of you! Come high-five us...
April 2012
12 posts
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Case Of The Virgin-Whore
I am unabashedly a virgin. When some friends learn that I’ve never had sex, they’re confused. “But what about that one time?” “Or that one guy?” “Seriously though?” “Why?” They act like I’m a unicorn and they’ve got just the boy to break me in. But when other friends learn that I’m barely hanging on to the last shreds of my V-card, they’re disappointed in me. They lecture me, they pray for me,...
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Let's Talk About Sex, Ladies
Full disclosure: I may have been saving that headline for a while. But back on topic! Vagina now has a sex editor. Her name is Basia and we are so excited to have her on the team. The babe had this to say about being a sex editor:
Sex is hard, wet, awkward, funny, boring, exciting, infuriating, and if you’re lucky, mind-blowing. As sex editor, I have more questions than answers. However, if we...
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Ladies, Remember to submit your pieces for the Spring Issue by Sunday, April 22 at 11:59pm. Send us your photography, reviews, music, designs, poetry, prose - anything you’ve done and loved. No late submissions will be accepted, y’all. Spread the word to all your photographer/graphic designer/etc friends too, s’il vous plait! We can always use more art! As always,...
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Why Men Love Bitches: A Review
Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dream Girl - A Woman’s Guide to Holding Her Own In A Relationship by Sherry Argov
Let me say from the beginning: too much attention is paid to this book’s title and not enough to its subtitle. The term “bitch” here doesn’t mean a demanding, inconsiderate diva but a self-assured, sassy, vibrant woman. Being a “bitch” in this sense, is a good...
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Letelier’s Pâté Mixes Tradition With Local Flavor
Jackie Letelier remembers being sent to school in Chile with pâté sandwiches packed for her lunch. While other 8-year-olds might get squeamish at the idea of pâté sharing space with their Snack Pack, Letelier grew up in a culture that commonly eats the gourmet dish.
“I just love the flavor,” Letelier said. “I love the creamy, buttery texture to it.”
Now living in Austin, Letelier brought her...
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Whore
Whore, I am. Slut, I strive to be.
Not an artist, dancer, or warrior poetess
Certainly not a mother or a lover
Books I read to pass the time
Degrees bring home the bread
But future, present, past
I dedicate to lewd immortality
Lascivious eroticism, salacious sensuality
The clothes I wear, a dangerous duality
From a distance excite
Come nearer, they invite
Skirts and shirts to turn you...
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Sorted History
At first there was Sean. Star of the drama club with bulbous green eyes that sparked fire among all the girls in the theatre company. He was in high school and I was only an eighth grader. He took me to the movies and we spit out our gum, replacing it for pink tongues.
He dropped me then picked me up again, we smoked some pot and made out in the bushes behind the YMCA on a Saturday night. On...
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My Fair Lady
There were no Connie Chatterleys
resting beautifully on their backs
having casually brought socialism
to England.
.
There were no little girls
sitting at her feet
adoringly rubbing toe-nails.
.
There was the cold creature
that ate her locks.
.
This difference she made in the world
was only losing those three organs
she had. Watching them searching
in the woods of Tennessee...
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Gingerbread Man
Once she ran to see the distance her legs would take her. It wasn’t far.
She tried again.
She selected running because she heard it was some sort of release. She runs so endorphins, adrenaline, or some chemical she probably learned about in biology is exerted. Endorphins make her happy, adrenaline makes her run more. She runs more, she loses weight, and that makes her happy. She loses...
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Ask Rachel!
Looking for a great liquid eyeliner? Not sure where to find red oxfords to help you experiment with French chic style? Can’t decide what to wear on your date this weekend? Or what to wear to that interview for life in the real world? Our new Style Editor, Rachel, wants to answer your style questions!
Leave a question in our Ask Box here on the website
Tweet or DM her at @TheVaginaZine
...
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Hello, Spring!
Hey y’all,
It’s finally Spring! (At least, it is in Austin. My sincere condolences to Caribou, Maine.) And with the new season comes a new issue of Vagina! Once again we’ll take all our most beloved submissions from the past few months and compile them into a lovingly handmade zine for your enjoyment.
Should you feel the need to help us make this happen, we’ve created a...
March 2012
26 posts
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My Life As A Fat Girl
I once had a friend, a male friend I should note, who gravely offended me. Me, who takes life mainly as a lark. He said, “Everybody knows fat girls give better head. They can’t just be easy. They really have to make up for something.”.
There are so many problems with those statements, I pointed out. It’s an over-generalization, it’s not true of all large women. And who says they...
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Meet Me In The Middle: A Poem
As I am a reasonable woman, I have decided in the spirit of fairness to entertain the notion that certain men may have a better one on one relationship with my vagina than I do.
As such, I am willing, for the briefest of moments, to suspend my indignation and sincerely consider the various rules and regulations that these gentlemen have recommended levying against the nation’s female reproductive...
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Film Review: The Big Empty
“The Big Empty,” based on the story by Alison Smith and written and directed by Lisa Chang (titled J. Lisa Chang), is both visually and emotionally captivating. The short film centers on a young woman experiencing a continuous ache in her vaginal region which no doctor seems able to diagnose. As a last ditch effort, our heroine Alice goes to see a specialist who discovers she is—in fact—empty. Not...
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No Strings Attached
So while reading the latest issue of one of my favorite glossy mags, Glamour, I stumbled upon an ad for the Instead Soft Cup. The ad showcased a slightly open door with the feet of a man and a woman in an intimate position. The tagline read, “12-hour leak protection so you can sleep. Or not.”
Wait, what?
I read on to learn about the Instead Soft Cup, touting itself as the “next generation of...
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SXSW + Vagina
Hello there!
Will you be at SXSW in Austin this week? Keep an eye out for Vagina! Our Editor-In-Chief Hillary-Anne will be out and about giving away copies of our Winter Issue, tote bags, and maybe some shirts. She’s got very short red-brown hair and she’ll be wearing her signature boots and a Vagina tote bag.
Are you on Instagram? Follow us at @TheVaginaZine for pics of femmes...
Motherhood
I am a successful, independent young woman. I work hard at my job as a journalist, and if I keep it up I could really make a name for myself and end up at a major publication.
So when people ask what my ultimate goal is in life, they seem surprised when I say that what I want more than anything is not to be strutting around an office in Jimmy Choos as a high-profile editor. I want to be a...
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What Not To Wear To Work
Let’s pretend for a minute you’ve entered the dreaded Adult World. You’ve just left that grand institution of higher education that, if you’re like the rest of us, you will be indebted to for the next 20 or 30 years. You could become your parents’ biggest fear: a starving artist in a big city, attending protest rallies in between bong hits. But you don’t. You choose a life of health insurance and...
February 2012
6 posts
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We Miss You!
We really, really, really do!
Unfortunately, we here at Vagina must all contend with jobs and school so sometimes our fun with y’all must be put on hold. But take heart! Our delayed posts do not mean that we are not accepting submissions! We are always thrilled when you share your work with us.
Sent me a poem a few days ago and haven’t heard back yet? I promise it doesn’t mean...
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Honey and Hydrangea
He closed his eyes,
his eyelids like waxen papier-mache
wrinkle delicately like origami
framing tender blue eyes.
The canvas of his body
stretched thin, all honey and hydrangea
his freckles, the citizens of his skin
dance across his arms and back.
In the crook of his creased elbow
a rough patch like crepe-chiffon
an over-worn party dress
my fingers taste the thread.
Together we fold...
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Freedom Of Whose Belief, Exactly?
We’ve seen a lot of business about birth control in the news recently. Some people think mandating insurance companies to pay for something that reduces the risk of cancer, regulates hormone problems, improves conditions such as anemia and ovarian cysts, and can be used as a contraceptive somehow impinges on the religious freedoms of organizations who are finicky about that “contraceptive” part. ...
A Womanly Conundrum
I don’t want my baby to be born.
Don’t get me wrong. At eight months along, I’m happy to be entering the home stretch of this pregnancy. I look forward to the end of itchy skin, the lung capacity of an asthmatic smoker, feet that look like rolls of sausage, and the constant trips to the restroom.
I am excited about the birth of my son. It will be amazing to see how my husband’s and my DNA...
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Dating Tips From 'The Bachelor' Episode 6
1. If you really, really, really, really, really want something, then it shall be yours! The more reallys you say, the better your chances.
2. If your date can survive being on The Bachelor, they can probably survive being stranded on a deserted island with a helicopter at their beck and call.
3. Stop wearing anything that covers your nipples when you go on dates. Seriously. Stop it.
4. Writing...
January 2012
9 posts
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Dating Tips From 'The Bachelor' Episode 5
1. I’m just gonna say it: getting dumped in Puerto Rico > getting dumped most anywhere else.
2. “I want to win this game so bad, I can literally taste it”? For the love of all things good, girl, tell your date how it tastes! Don’t leave them hanging like that!
3. The game of love actually is a game. Go team! Wait a minute…that’s not right, huh?
4. “Who knew strippers could play baseball?”....
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I'll Be Your Object
I’ll Be Your Object: In conversation with Lucy Parker and Katie Smither
[Katie Smither, Hallelujah, wood/paint/performer, 2011]
Lucy Parker and Katie Smither are young, charismatic artists currently living and working from Austin. Having completed their studies together at the School of Fine Arts at the University of Texas and exhibited across the nation, their work embodies concerns of...
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Dating Tips From ‘The Bachelor’, Episode 4
Sorry for the delay in getting these up! We here at Vagina are working gals and don’t always have time to watch our favourite crazy shows and offer up germaine and trenchant commentary on such things. What a shame, right?!
1. What? It would be terrible to go home without that time with him? Wouldn’t it be more terrible if you fell in love with him and then had to go home?! Naw, you right,...